When one county judge wanted to remedy the missed court appearance by the defensive attorney, he first asked for a reasonable explanation for the absense. The lawyer replied that he, "had the screaming itches of the crotch. I wasn't here because I would have been scratching my testicles constantly." The judge was not satisfied by this explanation so he held him in contempt; then doubled his fine for what he felt was a "degrading" excuse. [Judge one; jock-itch zero.]
