Alright, I can say it now. I'm a junkie. I have dedicated my life to one thing, and one thing only... to gain
a bigger penis. Some people are alcoholics. Others shoot heroine. Not this guy. For me, it's all about the dick.
It started when I was 22. I was an intern for a television production company in Los Angeles.
After drooling daily over the big-bosomed receptionist in the lobby (who I will call "Rene" for this article), I finally got up the nerve
to ask her out for a date. I had heard that she was "easy", for lack of a better word. Call me a male pig, but I was just
looking for sex. Relationship? Phooey!
I took Rene to a trendy West L.A. restaurant, then we danced the evening away at some silly nightclub. After countless margaritas, we ended up back in my
tiny one-bedroom apartment. Rene was horny, no question about it. Her
clothes came off quickly. Her breasts were as sumptuous as I knew they would be. Lust was in the air... and what a beautiful scent lust
is! I hurriedly tossed off my ties, shirt, pants, socks... and finally, my black Calvin Klein underwear. I literally dived on top of
Rene. Oh, the wonders of the Universe that were soon to be revealed to me!
Suddenly and without warning, Rene uttered four words that would change the course of my life forever. Barely
restraining a smile, she looked directly at my crotch and spoke....
"Kinda small, aren't you?".
The room started spinning. My world came crumbling down. Devil woman! How cruel, her savage tongue! Yes, I banged
her anyway, but that's beside the point.
"Kinda small, aren't you?". Do you know what words like that do to a man' pride? It
shreads up his self-esteem like a Dice-O-Matic ripping through a head of cabbage. From that moment forth, the only thing that mattered to me was
obtaining a bigger penis.
The funny thing is I never considered myself to be a "small" man. My penis measured, in its fullest
erect position, almost 5 1/2 inches. I knew I wasn't Ron Jeremy, but I never gave the size of my wang a second thought. Not until that fateful
night.
I first considered the notion of penile enhancement surgery.
However, on an intern's salary (which is literally nothing!), there's
simply no way I could afford the procedure without selling one of my lungs on eBay. And so, I turned to the internet. Everywhere
I looked, there were different enlargement methods taunting me.... pumps and pills, creams and weights, stretchers and liquids.
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